The ghost of my past :O

I texted someone from my past the other day . I was thinking "Oh shit , What the hell am i doing ? He wont reply for sure -___- you are so dumb lala !"  Then a few minutes later , He did reply my text . My heart was pounding the whole time i was texting him . We talkd about life , future and current things thats going on .

Little that i know , he already has someone that can makes him happy the way i could never imagine doing . The smile on his face at Spade when he hold her hand , I would give anything to have his gaze back then . But things change . So does feelings .

As days goes by , we became friends . It was a good thing for me . Because i never wanna loose him from my life again . Its hard enough dealing with my mistakes in the past . Its time for me to fix things up .

But how can i be friends with someone i used to love ? Seeing him with another girl just makes me feel like jumping down a cliff or stab my heart or something so that it wont hurt anymore . If you ask me if i still love him . My answer is .. maybe yes . Its hard for me to forget him even throwing away his stuffs makes me breakdown in tears . So i kept it all . All of our memories .

Pfffft, Who am i kidding man -__-" He obviously wont accept me back even if his single. What the hell was i thinking ? That i can just take him away from his new love ? NO WAY -_-" I'm not that cruel or bitchyy ! Guess i just have to accept the fact that his happy now :) 

Goodluck with her :) I'm happy for you both .

-lalarawr-